NetBeans is a great platform; it's free, it supports Java and JavaFX well, its very up to date when it comes to JavaFX... But is not for me. I've started using Eclipse many winters ago, and it's the platform I know fairly well, it quirks and pleasing points. Maybe one day I'll switch IDE again, even more winters ago it used to be vi, but right now I'm content with Eclipse.
The question then quickly becomes: how can I use Eclipse to develop JFXtras?
Up until recently the two available plugins, one by Sun and one by Exadel, were not up to par. They were able to edit one JavaFX file, but as soon as you mix in some regular Java or interproject relations they would fail. At then end of 2009 Exadel released a new version and I put it through the paces, but it did not work correctly. However, Exadel was very helpful and with the effort of Max and Alexsandr they got the plugin to a state where it can compile both JFXtras projects in a interproject setup.
2010-01-14: I tested Sun's just released plugin as well, but it at the moment seems to be at the level where Exadel's was two months ago. I will be assisting Sun, probably today, to see if they can get it at this level as well. But at the moment Exadel's is the only one capable of compiling JFXtras.
So, on to business. I'm assuming I'm not talking to newbies, after all we're developing JFXtras here, so I'm leaving out "the obvious". At the time of writing this blog, Exadel's plugin is supposed to become open source, but it isn't yet. And there neither is a Eclipse update site available, so the plugin needs to be downloaded manually from Exadel's website and be unzipped; I did that to C:\tmp\exadel-javafx-plugin-1.2.0. New versions can be unpacked to the same location and Eclipse can then update the plugin; the zip contains the contents of an Eclipse update site, so an online location can't be far away.
Naturally you have to make sure you have Eclipse 3.5+, JavaFX JDK 1.2.1 and a Java environment installed. And then:
Start Eclipse and go to Help -> Install new software...
Click Add...
Enter a name for the plugin, for example "Exadel JavaFX plugin"
Click Local...
Select the directory where the zip was unpacked, INCLUDING the eclipse directory.

Press OK
Check the Exadel JavaFX Studio
Press Next
Press Next
Accept the agreement
Press Finish
Wait for all the stuff to be downloaded and restart Eclipse when being asked to do so. Now the plugin is installed. The next step is to setup JavaFX; Exadel's plugin supports multiple versions of JavaFX, just like there can be multiple versions of Java configured in Eclipse.
Goto Window -> Preferences
Select JavaFX
Click Add...
Click Browser... and navigate to the JavaFX JDK directory, just like you would for Installed Java JRE's and click ok.

Click Finish
Click Ok
JFXtras requires the use of some jars that are distributed as part of the JRE. It would be inconvenient to have the path directly in the project's classpath, so at the moment the best option is to add these jars to the classpath of the JRE:
Goto Windows -> Preferences -> Java -> Installed JRE
Select the JRE / JDK that is bound to the JavaSE-1.6 profile, since that is what is setup in the project. Not sure how we are going to do this in the long run, but for now that is how it is set up.
Click Edit
Click Add external JARs...
Navigate to the JRE's home directory, then goto lib, and select deploy.jar and javaws.jar

Click Ok, Finish, Ok to close the preferences.
Eclipse is now setup for JFXtras. JFXtras developers can now update the sources and do an "import existing project" twice, once in the common directory and once in control. But for those interested, here are the steps how the projects were created.
Goto File -> New... -> Other
Select JavaFX -> JavaFX Project

Click Next
Enter the project name "JFXtrasCommon"
Select "Create project from existing source"
Click browse and navigate to the COMMON directory and click Ok.

Click Next...
Click Next...
Make sure that both src and test are marked as source folders (via right mouse button).

Switch to the 3th tab and remove any jar that is in the dist directory

Click finish
The project should compile now, try starting one of the test classes.
The next step is to setup the Controls project. But we do not want to simply set that up, but we want to refer directly to the Common project, including its jars. First we need to make sure the common project makes those jars available to related projects:
Right click on JFXtrasCommon and select Properties
Click Java Build path.
Switch to the 4th tab and make sure miglayout and swingutilities are marked as exported.

Click Ok
And now the second project must be created. Since that it largely identicaly to the common project, I'll not include so many screenshots.
Goto File -> New... -> Other
Select JavaFX -> JavaFX Project
Click Next
Enter the project name "JFXtrasControls"
Select "Create project from existing source"
Click browse and navigate to the CONTROLS directory and click Ok.
Click Next...
Click Next...
Make sure both src and test directories are marked as source folders (Right click the "test" directory and select "Mark as source folder" if not).

Switch to the 2nd tab and click Add...
Mark JFXtrasCommon and press OK

Switch to the 3th tab and remove any jar that is in the dist directory
Click finish
That's it! The project should compile now with only some Java warnings. It is referencing the common project and its exported jars.
Try starting one of the test classes.